Henry Louis Gates Arrested for Stealing Quart of Milk from Own Refrigerator

Written by Andy Borowitz Friday, 24 July 2009 06:48

Harvard professor Henry Louis Gates is back in hot water with law enforcement again today as Cambridge police arrested him for allegedly stealing a quart of milk from his own refrigerator.

 

"He was acting suspiciously in his kitchen, removing items from the cupboard such as a glass," said Cambridge police spokesman Ryan Slatson. "When he made a move for the refrigerator, we pounced."

One day after President Obama was harshly critical of them, the Cambridge police force received a strong vote of support from the National Alliance of Stupid Police.

According to an official statement from the Alliance, "We will be always on the lookout for perpetrators trying to break into their own homes, steal their own cars, and forcibly remove quarts of milk from their own refrigerators."

 

Andy Borowitz is a comedian and writer whose work appears in The New Yorker and The New York Times, and at his award-winning humor site, BorowitzReport.com. He is performing at the 92nd St. Y on April 30 at 8 PM with special guests Judy Gold, Hendrik Hertzberg, and Jonathan Alter. For tickets, go to 92y.org.

Read the original article in The Smirking Chimp

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